He frustrates the self sufficient

"The Lord watches over the alien and sustains the fatherless and the widow, but He frustrates the way of the wicked." Psalm 146:9

Do you ever feel completely lost, lonely and like a misfit?

Truth be told, we all, at times, suffer with these kinds of feelings. And there are seasons they are more intense than others. The question before us, during those periods, is how are we going to manage it? What will we do to get through that angst?

Some of us simply deny that we ever feel that way. Oh, how I wish, at times, I could live so superficially - kind of like on a cloud where "nothing bothers me". That uncanny ability to ignore or shut off the painful feelings of fear, loneliness, anxiety or just wondering "why in the WORLD am I here?" Some people have it down pat in steering clear from feeling the "pain of living".

However, when we are prone to ignore those truths of human existence, I believe we miss out on the deeper manifestations of who HE longs to be for us.

In a weird way, GOD seems to show up more miraculously for those who admit to their destitution and neediness. When we can "make it on our own" with busyness, talents, strengths, drugs, or religion, why do we need God? We don't. We simply use Him as an after thought or addendum to the strategy we have created to over come the pain and loneliness of being human.

Ya know what? I believe THAT kind of behavior is what He is referring to, in the above passage, as "wicked". Yeah, that is a strong statement but doesn't it kinda fall in line with the context?

He is all OVER the alien (stranger - those who feel completely out of place); the orphan (those who still struggle to know Him -or anyone- as FATHER) and the widow (those who are feeling unattached). But the wicked - those who think they can make it on their own; those who do not "need" God at those deep places - those peoples' efforts He merely frustrates EVEN if, on the outside, they are full of religious zeal and "godly wisdom".

Personally, I want to become more adept at just "sitting still" in my uncomfortable feelings of loneliness, worthlessness or fear. Because if I try to manipulate my way out of it even with a seeming "religious act" I will only face MORE frustration. On the other hand, if I just learn to bring all that emotional mess to HIM and then WAIT for HIM to show up, I will experience some kind of supernatural answer to my ache. It is nothing I controlled or concocted in my own religious ingenuity; it is the out of the box, miraculous love from my heavenly Father.

I think that will be a better supply for this widowed, orphaned, needy person that I am. I am tired of being "wicked" in trying to take care of myself or protect myself.